To Date, Or Not To Date, That Is The Question

Piper plopped down on the sofa next to Prue, her expression showing that something was bothering her.

"What's wrong?" Prue asked.

"Brian..uh, Leo, uh...he orbed in before and asked me if I wanted to have dinner and go to a movie with him tonight."

"That's not surprising," Prue said. "Leo thinks you're really Piper.  It's to be expected."

"But I'm not really Piper, I'm...I'm..."  Piper stopped, frustrated.  She closed her eyes briefly and took a deep breath.

"What's not to be expected - is that I wanted to say 'yes'.

"On the set, I never felt anything for Brian.  We did our scenes and that's all there was to it. You know that.  But now, every time Leo pops in - I feel drawn to him.

"The longer we're here the more I'm feeling that I’m really Piper.”

"I know," Prue said. "I'm seeing that with myself, too."

"Doesn't it frighten you?" Piper asked.

"A little," Prue said.  "I know who I am, who I'll be when we get back home.  But I know that for now, I'm also Prue.  We saw that our lives depend upon our thinking instinctively like, and actually being, the Halliwell sisters.  Maybe, in order to really think like them - we also have to feel like them.  It's part of what the The Elders did when they brought us here.

"But there is a side benefit to it," Prue continued.  "I get to have such nice sisters to live with."

Piper smiled and drew closer, placing her head against Prue's chest.

"What did you tell Leo?" Prue asked.

"I said I'd 'call' him later," Piper said.  She paused.  "I don't know what I should do.  If I go out with him, then I'm fooling him.  He thinks I'm someone else."

"Leo exists here because we're here," Prue said.  "Maybe he exists in some way somewhere else, on some other plane - I don't know.  But right now, he's here only because of us. You're the only Piper he knows and has.  So you're not fooling him at all."

"What about - fooling myself?" Piper asked.  "I'm...I don't know...I've been...feeling things about him...but they aren't real.  Or they wouldn't be if I wasn't here.  I don't know what I should feel...what I should do.

"If I go out with Leo...what's the point?  It will only be for while we're here.  Once we get back to LA, he won't be there - it won't go on."

Prue thought for a moment before she replied.

"We don't know how long we're going to be here," she said. "No one said we can't try to have some normalcy in our lives as long as we are here.  Or as normal as witches' lives can be.  There's nothing wrong with your having a little happiness while you're here.

"Follow your heart," Prue said.  "I just want you to be happy."

"Wow!" was Prue's reaction as Piper turned around to her.  They both realized that Prue had quoted a line of sisterly advice she had given Piper on Charmed when Piper was torn between Dan and Leo.

"I really have become Prue, haven't I,"  she said, a little amazed. "But I think it's the right advice anyway."

Piper sat up and looked at her.

"No guilt?" she asked.

"No guilt," Prue said. "Not here."

 

The waiter placed their dishes in front of them and walked away.  Leo started to say something but Piper's mind was elsewhere.

I wish I knew what I was doing, she thought.  I shouldn't be feeling anything being with him...but I am.  After all, it's really Brian, isn't it?

Or is it? she thought.  This is not real.  Leo's not real.  Or...is he?  Is there...really a Leo?  And what about things that he's said to me...that I've said to him.  Things that have happened here...and I don't know what they are.  What if he realizes I'm not who he thinks I am.

"Piper.  Piper," Leo said, trying to get her attention.

"Oh...uh...sorry, Leo," she said. "I just...sort of...never mind."

"Was I boring you?" he asked. "I'm sorry.  I was trying not to talk about work.  But I can if you'd rather."         

An evening with Leo without discussing work, she thought.  On Charmed, that would have been an ideal night.  But here I, am sitting with him in real life.  And I don't have anything to talk about except work.

I'm here only to vanquish demons.  And Leo is here...only because of me.  I don't really have much of a life here do I, she thought and sighed.

 

"I still can't believe we just walked in and actually got this table by the window, even on a Wednesday evening," Stuart said.  "The Cliff House's view of the ocean is always in demand."

The Cliff House stood perched on high ground, way above both the beach below it and the sloping Great Highway that passed by its front door. Overlooking the Pacific Ocean near Point Lobos, at the western tip of San Francisco's Richmond District, it was the only structure on the beach side of the wide road. Its stature undiminished over seven decades, it was still the place for drinks and a view of the sun's declination for those in the know.

"You usually need to have made a reservation for window seats on this side of the room way in advance," Stuart said. "Like from your grandmother's time."

"The sunset is gorgeous from here," Phoebe said.  "Maybe Grams cast a reservation spell for me for the day I would come here," she added, laughing.

"Seriously," she said. "I've been thinking about what you said Sunday night...about not making assumptions in new relationships.  Not many people share that opinion."

"I suppose not," he said, self-consciously toying with his fish appetizer. "I know I tend to be...somewhat sensitive about other people's feelings.  Too sensitive, I've been told more than once."

He looked out the window at the fading sunlight, the purple and red clouds reflecting its last glow.

"Assumptions aren't good for any relationship," Stuart said. "Even - or especially - established ones."  He turned back to her.

"When people have been together for a while," he continued, " the passion will eventually drop out of over-drive.  Of course, that's normal, as other parts of life demand their attention.

"But if he assumes that she knows how he feels about her without his really showing it - or even if she does know but he assumes that just knowing is enough for her - that will ruin what they have. The assumption will atrophy the relationship.

"You have to set aside at least an afternoon or an evening every week just to let her know what she means to you.  And every day, even if it's only for a few minutes, to show her how you feel.  How much you care about her - and about what's important to her.

"Too many men try to see the girl's view of things through their own eyes - instead of through the girl's eyes.  You have to be sensitive to her perspective.  It can make all the difference in a relationship."

"So, do you try to be sensitive to my perspective?" she asked.

"Yes, I do," he said.

"So what are you seeing now through my eyes?" she asked.

He leaned over the table closer to her, as if to whisper something private. "The end of a beautiful sunset," he said seriously and they both started to laugh.

 

Prue sat on the sofa, the Book of Shadows open in her hands.

"Piper is out with Leo," she said to herself, "and Phoebe is out with Stuart.  But it's OK.  I'll sit here and go through the Book of Shadows and see what's in there."

She turned a page, then another, then closed the book and put it down on the table.

"No, it's not OK," she said.  "You know," she said in a loud voice looking upwards, "I have a very active social life in LA.  The least you could have done when you brought me here was to have someone for me to go out with.  Prue would have someone."

She stopped and thought for a moment, a lonely expression on her face.  "Wouldn't she?" she softly asked.

 

 "Piper, there's something wrong here," Leo said as they headed for the door.  "It's been wrong the whole night.  You're not the Piper I know."

"I'm not," she said, a wave of guilt coming over her.  "I mean...I'm not?"

"No," he said. "You're remote, you're keeping your distance, like you're afraid to come close. You're still upset about last Tuesday night, aren't you?"

"Tuesday...night," Piper said. I'm caught now, she thought. I'm supposed to know what happened Tuesday night - the night before The Elders brought us here - and I don't.

"The whole night was supposed to be just for us and I got called away in the middle," he said.

"The whole night...just for...us," Piper repeated slowly as its meaning sunk in.

"O-oh," Leo said with dismay.

"Uhh...no, Leo, it's not that," she said quickly. "It's...not even you.  It's me.  I'm..."

"Feeling confused," he said.

"Yes - confused," she said.

Leo threw his arms around her and gave her a long, passionate kiss.  Piper felt her feelings for him being let loose, and her inhibitions melting away.

"Un-confused now?" he asked.

"Yes...uh...I...certainly am," she replied as a warm feeling filled her.

 

"Thank you for a wonderful evening," Stuart said as they slowly walked from the Cliff House back to the car.

As they turned the corner they saw a couple walking towards them.  One arm over each other's shoulder, they were kissing animatedly as they walked, with no concern about who else was around and looking at them.

"Well," Phoebe said after they passed by, "they seem to be in love, even if they are making a big spectacle of themselves."

"Love?  Perhaps, but not necessarily," Stuart replied.

"I don't think they'd be kissing like that if they weren't in love," she said.

"Kissing can be a manifestation of love," he said. "Or, it can have no connection with love at all.  But in either case, kissing is not love."

"Then you think love is all in the relationship," she said.

"The relationship is very important,” he said.  “A true relationship means that you are no longer just yourself but that there are two halves to you.  Because of that you can be in two places at the same time - and don't have to be a witch who can astral project to do it."

Phoebe smiled.

"A relationship means," Stuart continued, "that if the other half of you has a problem then you also have a problem.  If the other half has pain, then you have pain.  Just like if someone's left arm hurts, all of him feels it, even if his right arm doesn't hurt.

"A lot of people's relationships aren't true because they think of themselves as 'the two of us' instead of 'the one of us'.  Think of The Power of Three being The Power of One - that's a real relationship.

"But," Stuart continued, "the relationship is not love but only the result of love."

Phoebe stopped and turned to him.

"Then what do you think love is?" she asked, her curiosity piqued.

"Love...love is about having someone to care about," Stuart said. "Someone to do things for.  It can be something big and obvious.  But it can also be something small and subtle.  Putting a flower on her pillow, running to five places to find a certain tea that she likes, or picking up something from a store to save her a trip. Or just spending some time every day thinking about the little things you could do for her that she would like.

"Someone to surprise every so often with something that will put a smile on her face - and let her know how much you really enjoy doing things for her. It's about all of the good things that you want to be able to do for someone, that are pent up inside you - and finally having someone you care about to do them for.

"It's about having someone to make happy," he continued, "having someone to help, having someone to watch out for and protect.

"What is love?  It all comes down to one thing:  Love is having someone to show kindness to."

Phoebe looked into his eyes, trying to see inside of him. I've never heard anyone describe love like that, she thought.

"And this person keeps doing everything for the other one," she said. "If you're always the one doing the things, doesn't it get to be one-sided?  That can hurt...the love.  What do you ever get and when do you get it?"

Stuart gave her a quizzical look, as if the answer was so obvious that the question need not even be asked.

"The act itself, of course," he answered.  "The act of doing something for someone you care about is the greatest pleasure, the greatest joy, the greatest feeling of fulfillment in the world.

"When you meet someone special - someone who's wholesome, who's caring, who's intelligent and confident, whom you respect...and who has such a wonderful smile.  And the loneliness is pushed away." He hesitated for a moment. "Then you get a little nervous...will it last?"

Phoebe looked into Stuart's eyes, threw her arms around him and kissed him.

"It's OK," she said, smiling, as another couple walked by, staring at them.  "We made only a small spectacle of ourselves."